July 27th - Doc appt

Sorry about the sideways pic. I cannot get it to go the other way. You can really see her cleft lip in this pic.

She is really thinking about something. :)

Well, there isn't really much to say...... We were very disappointed as they changed our appt with the neurosurgeon from July 27th to Aug 18th. We were so excited to go there as they were to tell us if our little girl was going to make it or not. I am sure God has a reason for it and I know this is his will for us to wait, but it is just hard to wait.We went to the surgeon that will be doing her cleft lip/palate. It was a bit overwhelming but all of that will work out. They will not do any surgeries til she is 5 months old. She will have to wear a mouth piece until then. They have this new method out that just came to Iowa from New York. It lowers the surgeries they are to have. If she makes it, she will only have to have 5 surgeries her whole life on her lip/palate instead of 9-10. Her first one will be at 5 months, then 11 months, then 2-3 yrs old, another one at 9yrs old and the last at 17. After her first 2 surgeries she will have to be fed by a syringe as they are not allowed to suck on anything. She will also have special bottles to use. They will be squeezable ones. They said it will take 1 hr - 1 1/2 hrs to do a feeding. In her first 5 months of her life, (Before her surgery) she will be wearing a mouth piece. There are 2 different ones that she might have....1) It is a slip-in one that will be formed to her mouth. She will go to the doctor once a week to have a new one molded to her mouth as the mold moves her palate closer together to help decrease surgeries.2) The other one is a mouth piece that will be put in during a short surgery. Us as parents, will have to tighten the screws in her mouth twice a day until her first surgery at 5 months old. This also moves her palate and lip closer together.They will not know what mouth piece will work better for her until she is here. We did go to our regular doc appt also. They told us that her bubble has grown. We were a little disappointed as they said it wouldn't grow. There is now Brain fluid in the bubble as well. Her head is now almost 7cm and her bubble is 2-2 1/4cm. I asked the doc if we could start buying our little girl anything yet. He said 'No'. I knew that that was going to be his answer, but was praying that something had changed. I have gone to a few garage sales and bought a few things. I know I shouldn't but I wanted a few things in case she does make it. We added a few new ultrasound pics of her. You can see her cleft lip really well in the pics. She has really filled out and getting chubby cheeks. I just LOVE seeing her every month on the ultrasound. We treasure it! We are now going back every 2 wks. So we go back Aug 13th to our reg doc and then Aug 18th to the neurosurgeon. I will update after we go to the neurosurgeon. Please pray with us that we get good news. We know that she has the cleft lip/palate and we know that she will be mentally challenged but we do not care. We are just praying that we get the joy of having her in our life for years to come. She is a very active baby. She is kicking, hiccuping and moving around like crazy. God is using her for great things. We just need to keep our eyes on Him! We know we are not the only ones out there with challenges in our lives. We pray daily for those of you who we know are suffering! There has been many deaths and trials for so many. Our hearts go out to you all. We just pray that God's coming is soon!!Thank you for all your prayers, letters, cards and e-mails. We have a few down days at times and it is like God has laid us on someones heart that day, as those are the days we will get encouraging words.I ran into a friend last night at a garage sale and she was telling me about her trials with a few of her pregnancies. She was so encouraging to me!You can tell that God's handi-work was at work in those pregnancies. God carried her through and you can see that God had it all happen for a reason. That is so true! Everything happens for a reason and we might not know for years to come, but God loves us so much and doesn't give us trials for no reason. We just need to keep our eyes on Him.

June 30th - appt - 25 weeks along

Her hand in her mouth. She kept covering her ouchie mouth up. She doesn't like to show it off.

She is covering her eye. She was moving her one arm so it looks fuzzy.

Here is a profile picture of her. She has tiny ears and a small nose. You can see her cleft lip a little in this picture. You can tell she has filled out some from the last ultrasound pics a month ago.

We had our doc appt yesterday, June 30th. We always have an hour long ultrasound and a 45 minute doc appt. I love the hour long ultrasound and seeing her every month. She is growing great! She weighs 1 lb 6 oz. (I've gained 2 lbs in the month and she's didn't even gain a pound. Mmm..... Ha) Her bubble didn't grow, which is great! We love going every month and seeing how much she's grown. Her face has filled out and she is so much more active. I treasure EVERY kick and hiccup and movement.

While doing the ultrasound, they found that her heart would skip a beat. They took many pictures of her heart and checked every part of it. The doctor told us that he thinks that maybe it is just an immature heart and it will go away with development, but he is keeping a close eye on it. They also informed us that they are almost sure that she has a cleft palate along with her cleft lip. They cannot be 100% sure though til she is born. We asked how big her head is compared to how big the bubble is. Just to help us visualize it. Her head is 6 cm and her bubble is about 1 3/4 cm. Her head will, of course, grow but the bubble isn't suppose to. Her head is measuring a little small for being 25 wks along, but not to much. They said that it is measuring a week and a half smaller then what it should be. (That is one reason they are sure it is brain tissue in her bubble.)

They have set up appointments for us to go see the doctor that will do the surgery on her cleft lip/palate and also to see the doctor that will be doing the brain surgery. We are sooo anxious to go and talk with them. We will be able find out so much more. We are hoping that they will able to answer all the questions we have. We go to the doctor for her cleft lip/palate on Friday, July 24th, at 9:30. Then on Monday, the 27th, we will go to the neurosurgeon at 9 am and then our regular doc appt, with Dr Mandsagar, right after that. The neurosurgeon just came on staff today (July 1st). They said that if he didn't come on staff this soon, we would had to have gone to Iowa City. PTL!! See another miracle!

We have met and heard from so many new people during the last month. ALL the encouragement and wonderful words are great appreciated. Her first memory book is almost full and we have a 2nd one already bought. God has given us this little girl and we are so excited to see what God has in store for us! Many times we wish our pregnancies away wanting to hold our new little one; I love every kick, hiccup and movement that she does. I will truly miss this when she is born. I told Lenny that I just want to be pregnant forever with her. I know she is safe inside of me and I feel her all the time. We do not see all her problems as a horrible thing in our life, we see it as God is showing us to not take everything for granted and slow down and be happy and ready for each new day. You never know what God has in store for you! Amazing things come out of unfortunate situations. We would never want to change anything that has happened in our life the past 1 1/2 months. God has allowed us to meet and hear from so many people that we never would have met before. There are some amazing people out there. THANK YOU!! We love hearing from you. E-mail us any time. SLSASSMAN@IOWATELECOM.NET or find us on facebook in "Praying for Baby Sassman" group.

Many of you have asked when we are due. She is due to enter the world around Oct 15th. As of right now, he would like to take her a week early. So, right now, somewhere around Oct 7th. I usually go into pre-term labor, so he wasn't sure if we would be able to make the Oct 7th mark. Maybe Lenny will get his way and have a Sept baby. We will see. Praying to keep her in as long as possible though!

Deuteronomy 31:6 Be strong and courageous, do not be afraid or tremble at them, for the Lord your God is the one who goes with you. He will not fail you or forsake you.

Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him. And He will make your path straight.

Job 5: 8-9 But as for me, I would seek God, And I would place my cause before God: Who does great and unsearchable things. Wonders without numbers.

Dan went from his regular cast to his waterproof cast a few weeks ago. He was excited to be able to go swimming.

As of today, July 1st, he was able to get his cast off. They could still see the break but said that they could see the calcium build-up and it is starting to really heal. They allowed him to get his cast off (He broke the waterproof one last week.) and go to a splint. He still has to be very careful and has to go back August 5th for more x-rays to see if he can play tackle football this fall. It hurts a little, but I think what hurts him the worst is that once they took his cast off, he was scratching and he scratched some skin off. They said not to scratch as your skin is weak and it will come right off. (He learned the hard way.) He is so happy to have it off though!

Jake had his testing 2 weeks ago in Gus's Christian Black Belt Academy. He had to do his form, sparring, break boards and do his verses to pass his green belt. He did it and got his blue belt. I wasn't sure if he was going to pass or not. He was struggling, but was able to pass. He has now passed the white belt, orange belt, yellow belt, green belt and is on to his blue belt. Good job Jake! Keep it up and work hard!!!

June 2nd Doc Appt

In this pic, you can see her with her little hands to the side of her face. She has her pointer finger up. How precious! You can also see her cleft lip a little in this pic as well. We just love her sooo much!!!

This is a side view and if you look at the bottom back of her neck, you can see the bubble. They did say that it will not grow bigger.

Well, we had a doc appt at 8 am Tuesday. We got some good news and some bad news. They did a full ultrasound. A level 2 and a 4D. The 4D was so neat to see. She would move her hands in front of her face and feel the side of her face. Then when the tech was trying to look at her heart she would take her arms and put them on her heart. The tech would wiggle around trying to get her to move it, so she would move it for just a sec and put it right back up there. It was so neat to see.

The bad news is that her bubble is full of brain tissue. That is the one thing that we didn't want. There is also a small area in her brain that has a little more brain fluid then what it is supposed to. (More brain fluid also means brain damage) They are not sure what part of her brain will be affected but, yes, there is brain damage. They are not sure how bad. We have been praying for just brain fluid in the bubble, but I guess God has other plans. Lenny asked how he knew for sure it was brain tissue and nothing else. Well, he had told us at the last appt that her head was a little smaller than normal. So, he said that that was one sign. He also said that it wasn't fluid as fluid looks different. So, me (trying to look at the positive) asked him if it could be like a non-cancer tumor or just a big mass. He told me very unlikely. I asked him if I would carry her to term and he said, "Very much so, as you are doing everything for her, her body is under no stress."

The other thing he said is that he thinks her bubble is higher than her brain stem which is great. At the brain stem, is the part of the brain that tells us to breath. He said that if that part of the brain was in the bubble, she would have no chance. He did say that her bubble is close to the brain stem but that that part of her brain, he's almost sure, is not in the bubble. He said that there is a slight chance that the bubble is so close to the brain stem that the surgeons will not want to do surgery as it could lead to death. He said that that is for them to decide, not him. That will not be decided til after she has arrived into the world. Pray that it isn't that close and that they will do the surgery.

The good news is that her chances have gone up from 21% chance of making it, to 80% since that part of her brain isn't in the bubble. He is asking us to go to visit Hospice for newborns, just in case. He wants us prepared. He said that you never know what is going to happen after birth or while in brain surgery in such a small baby. (Anyone actually)

He said that he will be getting a whole team ready for the day of her delivery as a lot of people need to be there so she can go right to surgery. So, he wants it scheduled in advance. That also gives me time to tell my daycare parents what day I will not be here. My mother/family have told me that they would help with daycare while I am up at the hospital but we think all family members should be up there the day she is born, in case she doesn't make it.

Please pray that all will go well. The picture of her with her hands to the side of her face, just makes us melt and cry. We just love her already!! We are just praying for a miracle. God has given us many miracles, we know. One miracle God has given us already is by upping her chances of survival. We know God will be with her and us during all of this. Everyone wants a healthy baby and it is sad when you are told that that is not what you are going to have. But we do not care what she is like. We will accept her no matter what. We just want our baby girl. I think God is going to do great things with her. We have had people tell us that we shouldn't put us, our family, or this baby through any of this and that we should get rid of her. WHAT?!?!?!?! She is a gift of God. God NEVER makes mistakes!!! Seriously, some people have no trust in God. We have drawn closer to God and no matter what, we will be there for her. God has a purpose for her life. We do not know what it is, but there is a purpose for everything.

Jeremiah 29:11 - "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, " plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Thank you ALL for the e-mails, cards and posts on facebook. They are so encouraging. We have saved/printed every single one of them and put them in her book that we are making. Add us on facebook (Staci Van Der Hart Arnett Sassman)if you would like as we update that often or e-mail us anytime. We love getting your encouraging words or any questions that you have. Please let us know if there is anything that we can pray for in your life/family. We have a long prayer list and would love to add you to it also. I know we are not the only ones out there that need prayer! slsassman@iowatelecom.net

On a side note, God keeps our lives full and interesting. Lenny was gone on Saturday, up in northern Iowa, working on a friends semi and Brady went with him. My sister and her family came by to see if we wanted to go eat with them. The two oldest boys (13 & 11) didn't want to go and wanted to go with Jared's friends and ride bikes on the bike trail. I let them. Well, while I was eating, Dan,11, called my sisters phone (Mine was in my purse under the table. Not smart.) He said, "Mommy get home, I think I broke my wrist." I got up to leave and my brother-in-law thought he better go with to help me out. (THANK YOU!!) We took him in and sure enough his wrist was broken in 2 places. His brother and friends had left ahead of him so he walked/rode his bike all the way home with a broken wrist. Newton hospital said that they couldn't do anything about it until at least Monday, but DSM would be able to treat him right away. We wanted to drive him up there ourselves but Blank Children's hospital, said no as they wanted him on an IV and morphine before he got there. So, he had an ambulance trip. Once he got there they put him out and fixed it. We got home later that evening and he has a lovely pink cast. Yes, pink. He wanted that. The doc was kidding around with him and asked if he broke his wrist playing hopscotch. They were great up there!!

While was typing this I had a friend stop by and ask what we found out. She said that she was woken up at 2 am with a heavy heart to pray for us. See, God isn't finished with our baby girl yet! She has people praying for her and God will and is doing GREAT things!

We go back June 30th for another full ultrasound and see if we can talk to one of the surgeons. Please pray for a miracle!!!!! I will keep updating as we get news. Aain, thank you for ALL your prayers, e-mails, cards and words of encouragement. They help us get through this. We know there are people out there everywhere praying for our little girl. Please pass this web site out to anyone that would pray for her.Please continue to put her on your prayer chains at church. God is great!!!! THANK YOU!!!!!!!!

Update!

We got a call from the doctor office this morning and the in-depth amnio results came back. It shows that all 43 chromosomes that were tested came back as normal. PTL!!!!! We were soo happy! No, this doesn't mean that all is fine, it means is that she doesn't have anything else wrong with her besides what they found in the ultrasound. They told us that with what she has wrong, it usually means, they will have a lot more wrong with them. Well, God showed them! God is already working miracles!!! We are anxious to go back to the doctor on Tuesday as Lenny said that he has tons of questions for him. Was it really a bubble they saw, or was it a shadow? How can these tests come back good but they are saying she has a neural tube defect? How bad is her cleft lip? If the bubble is there, is there brain tissue in it? We have tons more questions and we are praying that they can answer them all for us next week. We are just seeing God working in her and us and praying for a miracle. We are praying that God heals her totally! There are days I just want to cry and go hide in a shell but then there are days that I can get up and conquer the world and know that God is in control, not me. I think I pray 24/7. This has brought me so much closer to God. At first I was bitter with God and life and everything. But God has put so many verses in my mind daily! I was really bitter earlier this week and that day I got something in the mail from our homeschooling (NICHE). In it they were talking about bitterness.(Gee, thanks God! He knew I needed it) In the story, it said, "Learn not to take things personally, but give hurts and disappointments to God. We must realize that bitterness seems to be directed at people, but it is ultimately toward God." It also said in there, "God allows trials to come into our lives to make us better, but satan fights to get us to become bitter." Well, that was me! I was allowing satan to win. God gave me a wake up call.

We want to thank everyone for the e-mails, cards and so many words of encouragement! You will never know what that means to us. We have started a book for this little girl, so she can see how many people were praying for her and thinking of her! If God decides to take her home, it will be wonderful to look back and see how many people were there for us and praying for her/us! THANK YOU!!!!

We go back Tuesday, we will update again, when we get back. Again, THANK YOU for all your encouraging words!!!!!!!!!

Our Baby Girl Needs Prayer!!

Well, I am not sure how to start....... We have found out some news this past Monday that has really shaken us up. We went to the doc for a regular check-up and then we were off to the specialist in DSM for a level 2 ultrasound. They said that since I am over 35, we just needed to get a ultrasound from a specialist to make sure all was ok. Well, the doc appt in Newton went great and I was getting nervous for the other one. We got there and we were able to see the baby. All looked great. She (yes, it is a girl) was kicking her feet and arms, I was mesmerized. Daddy was excited to hear those words, "It's a girl." During the ultrasound, they were pointing to different things and there was something that kept coming up, but the tech would never say what it was. I finally asked "What is this bubble that I keep seeing?" The tech said, "I am not sure but I am taking a lot of pics of it.It looks like it is on her neck." She then got done doing the ultrasound and left the room to get the doc. We had to wait for an hour for him as he was at the hospital delivering a baby. Once he finally came in, he did another ultrasound and then proceeded to tell us that the baby has a bubble on the back of her head. He said that it looks like the back of her head has an opening and then the bubble covers it. He was not able to see if there was brain tissue in the bubble but he said that he was almost sure there was brain damage. He said that if there is brain tissue in the bubble, then she only has a 21% chance of survival. She also has a bilateral cleft lip. He immediately wanted to do an amnio and prepped me for it right there. Needless to say that was painful and I found out later that they usually give you a shot first to numb you but he didn't want to take the time for that. (Lenny said that that might have helped him keep feeling in his hands during the process.)

We do not know why God has allowed our little girl to have so many problems. We feel like God is really testing us right now. I am asking for EVERYONE to pray for our little girl. We are praying for healing for her but if God decides not to heal her, then we are asking that He just allows her to live. We do not care if she has brain damage or a cleft lip. We will do whatever it takes for her. We love her already and we will feel proud that God thought we could handle a "special" child. We are just asking for prayer. We want her to live. Again, we are asking for healing, for a miracle, but if God doesn't give us that, we are praying for her to live. We are praying that we do not have to give her up to God already, but God knows better than us. We have our ups and downs.

The doctors have also told us that with this problem she has, they usually have many other problems. They did 2 testings with the amnio. They did a fast one and a in depth one. We got the fast one back saying that she is 100% a girl and that 6 out of the 43 chromosomes that they tested are normal. She also doesn't have Downs or Spina Bifida. So, we have gotten a little good news. We will get the rest of the test results on the other 37 chromosomes this coming week.

We go back June 2nd for another round of ultrasounds (3D) and see what else is going on. They are not allowing us to doctor in Newton anymore. We have to go to Mercy for doctoring now. We are praying that they do not see brain tissue in her bubble. We do not care about a cleft lip or anything else, we just want our baby to live! Please pray with us that God will heal her! I know that some day I will see her in heaven if God calls her home. But it will be so hard if we do lose her. We love her so much! Brady calls her his "rock star sister".

We are asking for you to keep our baby in your prayers. This is a emotional roller coaster ride for all of us. Please pray for her! We will keep updating this as we get news. You can also comment us or e-mail us at slsassman@iowatelecom.net . Please put us on your prayer chain at your church. Our baby girl needs prayer! Help us lift her up in prayer!!!!! You can pass this web site on to others for prayer as well!!!!!

SURPRISE!!!!

Two posts in one day. Whoa. I'm on a roll....... HA

Well, we have found out a few months ago that we are expecting baby #6 (Well 6th baby for me but 7 total in the family, counting Austin) We are due around the middle of Oct. Brady thinks this baby is all his and no one else. He asked us the other day what he is supposed to do with the baby when he is at school. We asked him what he meant and he said, "Oh, I will just ask my teachers if I can take the baby with me to school." Sure, Brady...... :) I am 15 wks along. I go May 18 to a specialist in DSM for a in depth ultrasound. They say that since I am 'Old' (Over 35) that I have to have one done. The kids are hoping we find out what it is. I told them that I am sure it is another boy as this pregnancy is just like the last 4. I have not had morning sickness but need to make sure to eat every 2 hrs, as if my tummy is empty, then I feel icky. We have made the basement living room into the master bedroom as we are running out of rooms. HA We got the paper in the mail on Friday also. Brady made it into Kindergarten. YEAH!! He is excited to go to 'Big Boy" school with Dan and Jake. He asked the boys if they will play with him at recess.

This is our room now which used to be the family room downstairs. We still have to finish building the closets but other than that it is nice. I have never had a big enough bedroom to have a recliner and a sitting area in it. It is my little get away. We just need a fridge/stove/microwave and we will not leave. HA It is nice during the winter as we have the fireplace in there. I didn't take a pic of the sitting area but we are enjoying it.

Ultrasound at 13 wks along. If you look by the ear, you can see his little hand and arm curled up.

Where do I begin.......

Well, I have not posted since Nov. So here I go. When you look at these pics start at the bottom. I accidentally posted them backwards. SORRY!!!!!! We have Jared, Dan and Brady's birthday. We have the new carpet and Jake passing his White, Orange and Yellow belts for his Christian black Belt Academy. I wanted to catch ya up. In Nov we went to ride the Polar Express train in Boone and also went to Disney on Ice. Dec brought Christmas, which is always wonderful but to expensive. Dec also brought testing for Jake's' White belt. January brought Jared's 13th birthday and also Jared started homeschooling. Feb brought testing for Jake to try and pass his orange belt. March brought Dan and Brady's Birthday and pine derby race. April brought Easter and Jake's testing to pass his yellow belt. So far Jake has passed all of his testings. He is on to his green belt.

Here is another pic that he took of himself. April '09
Brady got ahold of my camera at Jake's black belt testing and he was a little bored and started taking pics of himself. Interesting,eh???? April '09

Jake has now passed his yellow belt and is on to his green belt!!! Way to go Jake! April '09

Grandma VanderHart brought a pinata back from Mexico so we let the kids do it on Easter also. April '09

My kids and my niece and nephews running out for the Easter Egg hunt. April '09

My daycare kids just got done doing their Easter egg hunt and they couldn't wait to dig in! April '09

Jake at the pine derby races. He won design in his class 03/09 Him and Lenny made a semi carrying logs. March '09

Brady at the pine derby races. March '09

Brady's birthday cake. He turned 5. March '09

Dan's other birthday cake for his 11th birthday March '09

Jake was a "rat" in the play at school. March '09

Jake passing his orange belt and moving up to yellow! Feb '09

Dan's birthday cake. He is 11 now! Len & I made this one. March '09

Here is the new carpet! I just love it! I forgot how new carpet feels. I love taking my bare toes and rubbing them through the carpet. Feb '09

Lenny tearing the carpet off the steps Feb '09

Grandpa and boys tearing out the carpet! Feb '09

Tearing out the old mauve carpet! YEAH! I have waited for 5 years to do that~!! Feb '09

Jared's 13th Birthday! Jan '09

Jacob passed his White belt and is onto his orange belt. Dec '08

We rode the "Polar Express Train" in Nov '08